I’m giving up false modesty for Lent, but it’s no big deal.– toldorknown (via sds) (via whatson) (via jessicat)
Whenever I’m on my computer, I don’t type “lol”. I type “lqtm”: “laugh quietly...– Demetri Martin (via punchlines) (via youreatowel)
Can I just have one funnel cake … eating contest?– Meatwad while on a diet
Free pancakes all day tomorrow at IHOP just fyi
me: ahahahaha brad and angelina are going home with NOTHING, NADA, ZIP.
janazen: theyll probably go home with one of those indian kids
Getting my first set of business cards has made me ruler of the world of...– deebs0527 at Ruminations.com
The Seed by The Roots
Girl Scouts adds 'Cookie Locator' to Web site →
mermay: (via oregonian) Pure genius. Now I’m craving Thin Mints… i’m screwed.
I like parties, but I don’t like piñatas because the pinata promotes violence...– Demetri Martin (via soulgarden:wideeyedhippiechild) (via treydalton)